Usain Bolt thinks athletics will die if drug doping isn't effectively dealt with. The all-time best Jamaican sprinter is correct to identify doper-cheaters as a bane for sports - but is wrong to think that sports will die. Those casual observers that tune in every four years to the Winter or Summer Olympics will, mainly, not be up to date on the degree to which non-allowed drug taking has corrupted various events and disciplines. And, on the other hand, those keen sports fans will have by now grudgingly accepted that their favorite sports have doping - because they know the cheaters are seemingly always one step ahead of the testers - so what are they going to do, stop watching? Despite invidious drug cheating only the sports fan purist will turn away, and there aren't too many purists around... 

In fact for the sprints, many fans believe cheating is rife - and they aren't disgusted. They figure those cheaters are going to have better times, yes, which ironically will lead to more thrills and chills, but they accept the perniciousness because they know the runner still has to run the distance. Drugs are not a magic carpet ride: the steps have to be put in from start to finish.

While fair-minded folks wish doping in sports did not exist, or was a thing of the past, or was lessening - they are realists. They know that cheats will always be with us, in sports and in life. And while it may bug their ass that this is so, they will not quit watching or participating in their sport of choice.

True, the Tour de France has suffered in the wake of Lance Armstrong's sordid story - but this guy was a serial liar who blatantly lied so often that nobody, but nobody, will ever have the balls to BS right to your face like this unlikeable Texan did. He made the whole sport of elite cyclist road racing appear to be made up of 100% A1-jerks. For those cheating now, or in the future, their deeds to mislead will still be deplorable, but in a classier, more refined way - and their sport won't be impugned as being completely filled with dickweeds and deniers.

And let's face it - there are some of us who enjoy the spectacle of dopers in sports because we love to hear the reasons as to why they were found out. We can even put the dopey excuses into categories. From the boring, "Oh, I didn't know this wasn't allowed" to the buck passing "Geez, my medical team said all was ok" to the mind numbing "Really? I thought what I was taking was flax seed oil, not steroids!" to the romancing and heart rendering "I did it for love" to the, chew on this excuse for a bit, fanciful lie...based on feasting "Blame it on the Veal!"

We get the idea: the extent to which athletes, found out as short-circuiters, will prevaricate for their prevarications, is a laugh-riot. Worthy of water cooler talk. And don't we all know any publicity is good publicity?

Now watching sports on TV or via the PC is basically free (not including pay per view.) Perhaps what Bolt is worried about is that sports will lose the lucre, the loot, the dough from the paid consumer to either attend, fund, or sponsor people or events. And that could prove to be a problem, for sure. But has a sport disappeared because of this, to date?

Sports, even quite recently, have survived rotten and rampant institutionalized and mandated drug doping. Do you remember the Sochi Olympics? What a fiasco this fun-and-games show turned out to be. But haven't more than a few of us shrugged this Sochi off our shoulder, rationalizing that such over-the-top skirting of the rules is a hangover from the good old days of bad-old communism - and that things would have been worse if East Germany had run that show, and besides, that's just Vlad being mad - and oh, by the way, have you seen his ludicrous face job? Winter sports will survive Putin's putting one over on us...

In fact, down the road, if sport drug doping continues to increase, the authorities may have to throw up their hands in surrender and pass the baton - saying: do whatever you want competitors - and you the buyer - you the fan - beware.

And many of us will accept that drug doping in sports will be here to stay and some of us - the nerdish and scientific - will marvel at the ability of drug technicians and specialists from the dark side to find some new drugs, with names and ingredients no one can understand let alone pronounce - concocted to super-charge performance or at least stymie looming father time.

Usain Bolt is a great sportsman. One of the best. He could be right. Only the Lord knows how insightful he is about sprinting in particular, and sports in general, when he publicly warns us that drug doping equals the death of sports - but a mortal lad or lass has to think - and Usain - perhaps this is where you should focus on giving us teachable moments  - there is a worse form of cheating in sports that threatened to turn at least one of them into nothing more than an effete form of professional wrestling -
figure skating-in-sequins-wrestling let's call it - through its judges cheating, or its teams colluding, or both happening at the same time - f'ing fixing results. That kind of rule breaking IS beyond the pale.

​Do 60 to 70% of pro athletes go broke? Charles Barkley says so. He also thinks family and friends are the biggest financial drains on sports stars going.

And that money can vanish faster than a politician’s iron-clad pledge, whether it is through athletes giving gifts, cash outlays, or through athletes going into the seemingly, apparently, "less risky" ventures of co-signing or guaranteeing a loan without fully recognizing the liabilities and risks involved.
​
There are other reasons for sports stars sinking to nothing while swinging at everything when it comes to dollars: bad money managers; awful agents; terrible luck; rancid macro-economic conditions; pitiful timing; plentiful floozies; gambling on a John Daly or even a Charles Barkley level; lousy decision making...leading some into businesses like bars or restaurants - where the Adonis thinks their name and shape alone will make the venture profitable; bad ideas conjured at 4 in the morning fueled by intoxicants; intoxicants, and their abuse, leading to legal and financial penalties; rehab costs - thanks to those intoxicants; divorce; child support – with the latter ably demonstrated by Big Poppas like Evander Holyfield who, it is believed, helps try to fund 11 kids via 8 women; spending the same kind of bucks after the career is over to the same tune when the career was on; having supposedly hellish parents of the Arantxa Sanchez-Vicario variety...

Or bath tubs. Mike Tyson reportedly spent 2 million on a pure gold tub for wife number 1 and reported his state of bankruptcy in 2003.

Back to Barkley. Besides being pretty much a tub himself, Charles is great copy. He will say anything on almost anything. He’s blunt. He offends not only those with thick skins like us normal souls, he offends airy-fairy-snow-flake groups - most recently exhibited by folks who were pissed that the Pope said communion wafers aren’t, or may not be, gluten-free - - - so when Barkley blathered that some blacks were unintelligent because they favored lingo of the street over language of the educated, some folks went bat crazy. Point being: for barbs such as that...people either like him or loathe him.

But he does have a point when he avers that sports stars don’t owe family or friends anything - porous and/or poor profit-plans notwithstanding? (Ok, maybe these A-One participants owe parents a tithe for the efforts, time, and monies they put forth in getting the kid to practices, games, and tournaments - and buying equipment - and purchasing extra off-season training for the discipline(s) of their choice – and sacrificing their own wants and wishes in the doings - - - and perhaps the friends and family who supported the star - - - before the star became a star - - - deserve financial rewards - but that’s about it.)

Obviously an athlete, with a few million or more, would be cold hearted and emotionally dead to ignore seriously serious and sincerely sincere plights of poverty and problems – but clearly helping those less fortunate can make everyone, even star athletes - eventually, into beggars. Charles, in his inimitable manner and means, says he had to spend a lot of money getting rid of hanger-ons - and that the dough was well spent in the doing.

Perhaps Antoine Walker, who earned over 100 million in his career, and lost it all, now shares Charles’s sentiments. And Walker can partially blame himself and the approximately 30 family-friends for his bankrupt state. And perhaps now, and in the future, we can analyze why boxing, which wielded warriors like Tyson and Holyfield, is particularly prone to its A-listers going bereft, bust, and broke.

Of course, as one wise old owl told me, and probably as smart an old fogey told you...

just because those in your life, who count themselves as friends or family, doesn’t mean they can’t be total jerks.

So, if you want to clean up your life and muck out your stall from the clutter and crap which is your half-assed friends and full-bore family boobs...by all means lend them a few hun or a couple of thou. For sure, weasels that they are, they’ll amscray out of your life PDQ, and though you’ll be down some dollars, you’ll be up in harmony and happiness.

As for whether Charles is correct asserting that 60 to 70% of pro athletes go broke, who knows? Whether Barkley is bang on, or a bit off, it is astounding that so many high profile professional athletes have gone belly up, given the huge amounts of monies they squired up to squander later. Charles Barkley has certainly put the spotlight on the fact that sports stars ARE HUMAN - and can mess up just like the rest of us. They are not infallible. They do stupid things. They should not be role models. They should be treated and analyzed, as the individual they are, with their whole gamut of pluses and minuses factored in.
​
And as for you and me? Let’s not go ostentatiously overboard like so many a sport hero has done.

Ok? That way Charles Barley, and his bark, won’t have a handy reason to bite his bankroll opinions of

US.

​A wet dream of orgasmic proportions is how one announcer described a Cristiano Ronaldo goal.

But what of the dry nightmare tax-evasion accusation the fantabulous Portuguese footballer faces?

Words cannot express Rocket Ronaldo’s greatness but soccer commentators have jobs to do and their truly difficult trick is to NOT use superlatives already in play to describe this guy, this forward, who, in his own words, grew up poor. Thus we hear tributes like:

“Confidence personified. The magic remains. Stunning, absolutely stunning. One of the best goals he’s ever scored. Absolutely sensational. Brilliant. We are witnessing an exhibition tonight. Not many players can do that. An absolute stunner. Oh my word. Top drawer. Can you believe the genius of this man? Unstoppable. Fine individual strike. An invaluable talent. This man can’t stop scoring. Did he really just do that? As outrageous a goal as you are going to see in any league. Not too far out for him.”

But is Cristiano’s being accused of shortchanging Spain some €14.7m (£12.95m) between 2011 and 2014 far out? Or is this just sort of a “misunderstanding? But, if not - if he is guilty – well, why would he ever do such a thing? The superstar had more than enough money during the period in question. Would it be due to greediness, or might it be some deep, dark thoughts of retribution and revenge he harbors towards authorities in that country he’s played in - in trying to “take it to the man” via tax fraud?

He’s to appear in the Pozuelo de Alarcon court this July 31st   to determine if he is charge-worthy.
For sure, if he is eventually found guilty and has to pay a fine, he can shake his Nike piggy bank which pays him, in a lifetime-contract, a cool 1 billion bucks. Or he could dip into his salaried funds of 50 million dollars annually. Or, failing these options, he could hold a raffle: pay my fine – betcha at least 1 fan of his 275 million social media followers would cough up the needed dough.
​
275 million athletic supporters can’t be wrong, because, besides being one of the best soccer players of all time, he seems to be on the right side, on his Twitter account at least, of apparently supporting causes like donating blood (there’s a picture of him with a sign that says donate blood) or apparently feeling angst over global refugees and feeling anxious over not enough Saving-the-Children going on to suit him.
And surely he can’t be nearly as corrupt as your basic, wedded-to-entitlement-and-lucre, money grabbing and grubbing FIFA kleptocrat is, can he?  

Perhaps we should cut him some slack – until we know the complete story. Perhaps Spain’s Agencia Tributaria is charging The Sultan of the Stepover out of bitterness, knowing his net worth, estimated at 375 million as of 2016, is a healthy economic barometer, when compared to the Great Recession that has wrecked Spain and its economic barometers since 2008. Perhaps the state legal service, which is the stick of that country’s tax doings, is shelling tax flack at him because he’s better than all their players. Perhaps one of their tax bureaucrats hates soccer and especially detests how the slightest mishap has a player writhing as though he’s been trampled over by the 3rd Panzer Division. Or maybe the bureaucrat simply goofed in his or her mathematical assumptions and computations.

Or, much likelier still, given Spain’s being ranked (the lower the number the higher the perceived level of corruption) as 58th out of 175 countries being measured – has a tax authority simply looking for a bribe to make this whole unseemly affair go away...

No matter what Spain’s role is, Ronaldo, AKA the little bee “abelhinha”, should look at replacing, or getting, a financial advisor familiar with overt tax laws in Spain which consist of tax regulations (including – and this is a partial list: economic activities tax; personal income tax; and wealth tax), tax agency regulations (including Acts, Royal Decrees, Ministerial Orders, Resolutions, and Instructions) other regulations of interest, international taxation regulations, regulations pending or

Geez, starting to feel woozy here, starting to feel Ronaldo’s pain. CR7 you’d best get a financial fixer and finagler who can deal with Spain’s covert skullduggery and behind the scenes tom-foolery.
That would have saved him from his presently being thought as somewhat of a cad to, if he’s found culpable, of being ultimately found as a criminal.

Should the latter be the case he can compare tax fraud felonies with rival Lionel Messi, who had HIS tax-fraud conviction upheld by Spain’s Supreme Court. Should the former be the situation Cristiano Ronaldo can share boo hoo stories with José Mourinho, who Spanish authorities think burned them for €3.3m (£2.9m) while he was managing Real Madrid, or Ronnie can sip some weak tea and do a whole sob sister oh-so-sad-story thingy with Colombia’s Radamel Falcao, who Spain think hosed them for £4.8m or hey, Cris can share a few stiff drinks and shout a few stronger protestations over the horror of it all with Argentina’s Javier Mascherano, who the tax office in...Spain...of all places - thinks tried to pull the wool over their eyes to the tune of £1.3m or Ronaldo, if you haven’t yet fainted from the tax-impositional indignity enveloping you, could shoot the s—t with Spaniard Xabi Alonso who, Spanish tax authorities believe hasn’t been kosher in minding his Ps and Qs when it comes to remitting to them their considered fair due in duties.
​
Two things are for sure. 1) The Spanish Tax Authorities are taxed to the max in ferreting Euros out of bedroom bureaus and 2) Ronaldo won’t get a decent night’s sleep, or a randy night wet dream orgasmic evening, until this tax fraud caper-case is put to bed.

​Rahsaan Yearwood needs his head read. He’s the father of a once-son who expresses himself as a daughter. The son’s name is now Andraya. He’s got a bit of a mustache, is well built, admits he often wins in track while identifying as a male, and now thinks he’s a female. So he/she is now the best girl track star at Cromwell High School. It’s in Connecticut and its second place finisher in the 100, Kate Hall, who won this event last year, has learned 2 things in her short tenure on earth. 1) Boys can race as girls without undergoing hormonal transplants and/or surgeries and 2) Speak softly to mask your true feelings at such a crazy thing being allowed to happen: “It’s frustrating, but that’s just the way it is now.”

Back to dad. He says (paraphrasing) we are born into a body, we are born into a situation...but we grow into a person we’re going to be (hardly profound thoughts for a math teacher) and when people ask me why is your daughter running with the girls – I answer - because she’s my daughter. As for fairness? He says he doesn’t think of it. How dandy for dad.

Brian Calhoun, the track coach at Cromwell, plays small ball, gushing: “I have a spectacular female athlete, there’s nothing more to say.” Really? Don’t you have a guy who identifies as a girl – but is a guy in physique, running with the girls? He then contradicts himself and goes on to say more. Basically he doesn’t want anyone to take issue with his stance that this situation is perfectly just. He doesn’t want this situation approached in any other way – for that could create an issue or a conversation...and he avers there really is no issue, nor conversation to be had – other than getting Andraya to improve her running times and finishes.

So he wants to preclude large-picture eyes-wide-open contrary views as he myopically and proudly proclaims “we have a great athlete...”

Where does mom, Ngozi Nnaji, fit into all of this? Well, she wants to lash out at comments she doesn’t like...and she says the love she has for her child is unconditional. The latter seems noble but overlooks the travesty of having a girl in a boy’s biological body winning races against girls with girl bodies. It’s not fair. Anybody with half a brain can see that. Ngozi adds: there’s no judgment. Too bad for mom, for what Andraya is foisting is a farce.

Yes, mom casting no judgment is crazy. Tolerance for the intolerable is not tolerance, it is submission, surrender. Instead of parenting she’s a passenger, a passerby, a patron, a potted palm, not willing to instill values of what is right or wrong but is, instead, willing to let the chips fall where they may and is willing to let the train crash without doing anything to stop it. “She can be whoever she wants to be...” (One wonders if mom would accept Andraya if he/she goes all genderfluidy and decides she’s a guy again?)

For Kate Hall, who may have aspired to a college or university scholarship – if she is now overlooked – would this not be a travesty? And how does she feel Cromwell’s motto:
“Placing Students First”
corresponds with her situation? She’s not first. She was beaten by Andraya, a transgender athlete – where transgender means in his/her case...what? If one feels like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole, in matters of sexual orientation and gender identity – but hasn’t yet taken concrete steps to change one’s sex to the gender they identify with, isn’t that just so much posing?

Andraya says she’s used to winning. So victories started when she was a he. So why not really go for the gusto? Announce you’re a girl – and race against boys? Show the world that girls (albeit still in boys’ bodies) can beat boys in the sprints. Wouldn’t that be something? Wouldn’t that be a lot more impressive and courageous than running against girls with a boy’s physical attributes?

In fairness, Andraya, like many young women, is soft spoken, wear her hair long, and is inclusive – hoping her story inspires others. But boy oh boy, her shoulders are ripped – and will remain that way until she begins hormonal treatments.

Apparently a revelation occurred back in grade 1 or grade 2 (she’s not sure which) when the then tyke wore a Cinderella dress on Halloween – to Andraya that was the start of her realizing that she might be entombed in the wrong gender. But could it not have been just another example of a boy being a boy and doing a silly thing to attract attention, shock friends and freak out the folks? Another sign that something was amiss for Andraya was when, in grade 5, she wore pink and purple colored furry boots to school.

Dad, mom, and the track coach are all conveniently overlooking the elephant in the room. Andraya has a huge advantage in track events like the 100 and 200 because she’s got a boy’s musculature and power with a testosterone kick. As a freshman, (“freshman” will definitely have to be carted out to the woodshed and horsewhipped into a more pc word), Andraya may be a good girl, but she isn’t, or wasn’t, the best girl. In the Connecticut outdoor All-State Championship she came 3rd in a time of 12.41 seconds in the 100 meter dash. (Shanea Calhoun has the best State time of 11.82 set back in 2004.)

So dad and mom exude insouciance about the guy who thinks he’s a gal while the track coach exudes ebullience. Many of us exude penitence, realizing our vexations about this story have us, seemingly, sadly, and astoundingly, hopelessly wrong - based on the new "rules" and "mores" of what’s allowed in gender definitions this day and age.
​
Definitely we who disagree, need our heads read.

​Will Chris Froome three-peat this 2017 Tour de France? And is Le Tour still one of the most essential sporting events worldwide, or has it slipped - because of sleazy drugs and slimy cheating - to a b-list happening?

Anyway, down the road, the future of supreme bike road racing may belong to another Britisher, Adam Yates. The guy won the white jersey – defined as the best placed finisher under the age of 26 - in the 2016 TDF. He placed 4th when all was said and done.

But the future is now, and if the 2016 Tour de France was any indication - with Froome front and centre in debate and in anticipation of success - or failure – in this 2017 edition, at least 100 channels will air it to at least 190 countries to be watched by 3 BILLION.

(By the way, in stage 1 of this 2017 Tour, Chris came 6th, and he has happily announced he's signed on for 3 more years with Team Sky.) 

Despite Chris's latest results and news, undoubtedly these TDF numbers would be higher but the stench of Lance Armstrong’s chicanery looms over every facet of the bicycling endurance race and Froome’s Team Sky and British Cycling being investigated by UK Anti-Doping sure hasn’t helped...

Nevertheless, between 10 to 12 million spectators, if not scaring the daylights out of the riders by jumping onto the route waving their arms wildly, will, for sure, loom over the route and press against the edges.

But is La Grande Boucle as edgy, unpredictable, and pressure packed as riders and fans tout? Sure crashes erupt helter skelter, but a glance at previous winners shows, often, repeat, consecutive wins. If it was as iffy and chancy as proponents aver and was truly competitive, would not more individuals have won - with individual cycling dynasties a rarity rather than commonplace?
​
Of course many will retort that cream always rises to the top and that past greats like Indurain, Hinault, Merckx, LeMond, and Froome rose to their natural, expected, excellent level, predictability be damned.

For sure, there’s pressure to piss. Sitting and straining for hours per day, with only 2 days rest over the 21 stages, means riders have to “go” and like “now.” Some pull over en masse to do the deed; others fiddle with their shorts to do it whilst upon the bike! Amazing, that.

Even as amazing is that it is illegal to urinate in a stream or river. Stick to the tree and try to let the riders behind you know that, so they don’t shamelessly pass you by.

Most amazing still, Mark Cavendish admits to pissing himself if the weather is chilly.

For sure, while youngsters adulate these cycling cyborgs, they should know life as a professional bicycle road racer isn’t all peaches and cream. For starters, the starting pay of £35,000 or $45,150 USD - isn’t that great. And life on the road, racing and travelling to races, sounds somewhat monotonous and definitely irksome. You’re not with loving family and best friends, you’re with teammates - some likeable, some loathsome.

But The Tour de France isn’t all agony. Sure this year’s edition promises a climb as steep as sin to La Planche des Belles Filles, but when not huffing and puffing upwards, the peloton will find its members either daydreaming or casually chatting to fellow rivals, talking about Paris, or talking about future events on their racing calendars.

Alas, however, for 3 weeks the casual fan tuning in will, if the TV is mute, be hard pressed to recognize a particular rider, any rider, save for their faves in winning jerseys. Basically, helmets have removed any chance of easy facial recognition. Indeed, apart from stage-winning jersey wearers, the only standout from the crowd might be Alex Howes – because he wears funky sunglasses.

Howes et al will begin the Great Loop in Düsseldorf, Germany, with a did-you-see-that-blur–whizz-by 14 kilometer individual time trial.

But let’s put the brakes, right now, on one trend, shall we? We know the cyclists in the 2017 Tour de France, to a man, will be in awesome shape. But to the casual ballsy beau mansplaying at home, don’t imitate the professionals and don Lycra when you get off the couch to pedal and peddle your wears and wares about town. You’re chubby in all the wrong places and you’re contributing to blight and visual pollution. The Lycra look, for you, is not good. Scrap the spandex and stop MAMIL’s (Middle-Aged Men in Lycra.)

Where were we?

Yes, Froome, the favorite, going for his 4th win in 5 years. This Nairobi born road racer certainly thrives in the suffering of training and racing. He might even admit, to himself at least, that he enjoys it. After all, roads in Kenya, whilst adequate for marathoners, were hardly conducive to a kid dreaming of elite cycling. Conditions there were, to be generous, Spartan – But Chris had no complaints...

To copy the feel of alpine climbing where such terrain didn’t exist Chris would pull his breaks to create the necessary struggle and resistance...He admits in his early days (around 2006 by this point) his technique was terrible “crash Froome” - but he had “an engine” - an engine later stricken with Bilharzia, a parasitic disease harmful to red blood cells – the means to transport oxygen.

He also admits his first TDF back in 2008 was a huge learning experience with the speed seemingly 10 kilometers per hour faster than any race he had been in previously. He was 1 of 4 riders for his 9-man team, to finish. In the 2012 Tour de France he had to take a back seat to teammate Bradley Wiggins, causing some discomfort for himself, Wiggins, and the team. In the 2014 race he pranged up his left knee, left wrist...right thigh, leaving the contest prematurely. He had to fight suspicions of doping...

And just this year, in May, he was deliberately knocked off his bike in a hit and run: the bike was mashed, but Chris was unhurt. (The road rage driver remains at large.)

But, and this is a big but, until finishing 4th in June’s Critérium du Dauphiné, he hadn’t raced competitively since April, and his running of his own schedule has undoubtedly caused  Team Sky some consternation.
​
Thus, come this July, the world will watch and wonder again if Chris will be the best bet overall in climbing, descending, time-trialing, and cross wind cycling – blessed with a, oh my, peak oxygen uptake twice that of normal humans - enabling him to hit the breathtaking heights of yet another Tour de France win.
 

​Way to go, John Daly. With your latest golf victory you’ve proven that a serious serial smoker, boozing passer-outer at Hooters, junk food jonser, zooming through multiple red lights in-a-row driver, and and a fanatic despiser of fitness - can reach the top.

You’re a role model to zillions.

In winning the Insperity Invitational on the Champions Tour you’ve inspired millions, ok, thousands, ok hundreds, ok tens of folks to consider watching your career progress, despite you wearing lewd, crude, and goodness gracious god-awful-retina-razing outlandish golf slacks.

Clearly a man-god surpassing mortal men was proven when, on Saturday in August of 2015, one of your lungs collapsed, you were sped to the hospital, but the next day, like a Phoenix, you returned to play out the tournament in Canton, Miss.  

And clearly a Zeus are you – who else has had as many scintillating sexual escapades, including having four wives – and is considering marrying yet again? And clearly, too, you are a criminal-cad for assaulting wife number 2, Bettye Fulford.

Basically John’s a portly huffing and puffing, 40 butts per day, 50-year old senior, who, with his first win, 14-under, on the seniors’ tour, has awoken legions to that tour’s existence and re-awoken a horde of fans to his legendary high-wire act of cavorting and careening through life. Fellow professional friends of his were so pleased for him they showered the big man in champagne after being the best on The Woodlands, in Texas.

He’s come a long way - and yet has come full circle. Back in 1978, as a 12-year old, he won the Lake of the Woods Golf Course Men’s championship prompting that course to ban kids from entering that adult contest ever again.
​
Not sure if he needs the $322,500 cheque from his latest heroics but let’s assume he does. John admits he still gambles. He loves the slots. He’s even played a slot machine which was $5,000 for each pull. (John says he lost $600,000 in that session.) That’s his gambling vice of choice, though blackjack comes into play. While Vegas may be the destination for most, John says he’s not fussy: he’ll gamble anywhere...He might not be losing hundreds of thousands per year, but if he’s still rolling the dice as it were, he’s got to be losing a fairly pretty penny, though he says he won 1.8 million at Bally’s - in one day - a few years back.

So how did Daly fight the long odds against his winning again? Well, none other than Tiger Woods gives us the scoop. “Long John”, it turns out, was - is - awash in raw, natural talent proven by winning his first Major, the US PGA, in his first try.

Folks adore the “Wild Thing” because of his vulnerabilities and frank willingness to confess and somewhat confront his addictions. They also adore his counter-intuitive thoughts, like this beauty, expressed in an interview with Howard Stern a couple of years back: practicing causes imperfection when I do it...I suck when I practice.

He’s been fighting the practicing of golf thing since he was around 4-years old. He admits, like Bubba Watson, that he’s his own teacher – save for studying Jack Nicklaus golfing tip cartoons. The “Lion” says his toddler, a two and a half year old son back in 2015, has hit more practice golf balls in his life than Dad has in his. Gotta, sorta, love this guy, huh? John also jokes “Caffeine and nicotine, to me, equal protein.”

More insights in the Stern interview ensued. Talking about one of his wives, John came up with this gem: “We love each other just a little bit more than we hate each other...” His second wife lied about her age – understating it by 10 years. He says that cocaine and cigarettes are the two hardest things to quit. He asked Howard Stern if he could smoke during their interview. Howard also offered him a beer, John didn’t say no...He was given a Heineken Light, took a big slug, and announced “this isn’t bad.” He says 18 shots of scotch ended up being the impetus behind the invention of 18 holes of golf.

And who else can sink a 10 footer curving putt with a cigarette hanging from his mouth?

And who else may be as smart as Daly, if his dad is any indication? (Smartness isn’t the same thing as common sense, obviously.) One source writes his father, Jim, built and repaired nuclear power facilities.
​
Yet as we marvel at John’s highs and lows - heck he’s had more ups and downs than an Xpogo stunt team, has been his own worst enemy, seems consumed by his bad lifestyle habits, and apparently appears to be a train wreck just waiting to happen - does demonstrate in spades - that these traits are SO NOT marvelous - if we, looking for guidance, are wishing to emulate star-shown characteristics. But now he has kids, and, as we age, we tend to moderate our lifestyles – so maybe these two factors, plus his latest win, can put John in a sturdier station of life leading to a somewhat normal, sane...semblance of...uh, something or other.

It’s kinda fun and a total eye-opener to read and see of John’s over-the-top idiosyncrasies, proclivities, and inanities. Even his mixed messages real, and imagined, are pretty amusing. He has been commercially associated with both TrimSpa and Dunkin’ Donuts and has ventured that such a contradiction isn’t nearly so profound as his proffered idea of publicizing AA on one hand, and Miller Lite on the other.

And we can howl in laughter at this pearl. Asked about where he finds his wives and women, he ripostes he didn’t find his wives in church. Gotta say again - gotta - sorta - love this guy. Sure hope he can keep it sort of together, maybe to write another book as a continuance to the 2007 tome titled:

My Life in and out of the Rough: The Truth Behind All That Bull**** You Think You Know About Me.
​
We’d sure like to find out in new, pen-to-paper pages, what else this larger-than-life fellow could prove to the world.

​Aah, the certainty of youth. Eugenie Bouchard should focus on her career and stop slamming Maria Sharapova. Eugenie is now 23. Professionally she peaked in 2014. She’s a has-been who, though refreshingly candid and well spoken in both French and English, misses the mark in calling for Sharapova to be banned for LIFE in admitting to taking Meldonium.

This drug aids the heart. One drug expert, Don Catlin, doesn’t think it is a performance enhancer and the USA, normally anal about drugs, doesn’t declare it illegal. So, while the International Tennis Federation (ITF) tribunal screwed Sharapova over – sentencing her to a 2 year ban – for using it, Sharapova points out that the drug was legal for years before the rules changed and that she brought up her transgression in a press conference and was partially vindicated by the Court of Arbitration for Sport (CAS) when that body reduced her time-out to 15 months.

So the Russian born tennis star – a 5-time grand slam champion – who has been ranked number 1 – has to take this flack from 59th ranked Eugenie? Really? Bouchard should know not every issue is either/or; black or white. There’s lots of gray in life with choices, circumstances, and issues - and all are not as clear cut as they might seem at first glance.

Of course almost as bad as being too quick to judgment is the resorting to playing the victim. And Sharapova shamefully does so:

"...I hope the ITF and other relevant tennis anti-doping authorities will study what these other Federations did, so that no other tennis player will have to go through what I went through."

For heaven’s sake get some perspective. It’s not like you ran through the gauntlet. You’re not a present-day female Christian martyr nor are you a modern heroine Joan of Arc. Maria, you are, simply, someone caught outside of recently changed tennis rules on drug taking – exacerbated by you being woefully unaware that America – the place you’ve basically lived in for years now – has its Food and Drug Administration (FDA) - and they have never approved Meldonium for the U.S.
​
Meldonium is also known as Mildronate. The World Anti-Doping Agency banned it because it found, in their hallowed opinion, some people were abusing it.

For those, though, with traces of it, WADA deems that “a no fault finding.” Sharapova says she’s taken the drug for years because she lacks magnesium in her body and because her family history features diabetes.

Let’s leave diabetes out of this, let’s look at magnesium. A lack of it increases susceptibility to, among other things - 2 big no-nos so far as being an elite tennis player is concerned: muscle cramps, and chronic pain. To help retain magnesium drink less caffeine, drink less pop, eat fewer donuts and other junk foods full of refined sugar, and partake in no more than 1 alcoholic drink per day.  That should help us, and Maria maintain healthy magnesium stores...

Maria seems to have a healthy store of ego, however. Asked to respond to Bouchard’s blast, she replied: “...I am way above that.”

Er, OK, then. Good to know.

In not rising to the bait Sharapova isn’t showing much fighting spirit. She doesn’t appear too confident in her defense of this over-the-counter-in-some-foreign-countries drug. If she feels Bouchard’s opinion is beneath contempt – she should say so. Put Eugenie in her place. Eugenie is not a big star, though she has flashes – Maria should tell her to work on her lob and leave the rhetorical grenade-attempted aces to someone of more stature – like Serena Williams, say.

Here’s what Maria should have said.

Eugenie, work on your modeling career ‘cause your tennis one is going nowhere – despite you digging in at 9 years old - and despite your family having enough bucks to send the whole lot of you to Florida so you could get lessons from Nick Saviano. You STILL have no offense or defense despite Tennis Canada’s naming you their Female Player of the Year for 4 YEARS straight...Get Vogue on the phone. Or IMG Models. Tweet the barmy “The Genie Army” of same. If you must play tennis, fix your personality and ban the brat act at the very least. Stop being a prima donna and start growing up. Realize that outside of yourself, in your own bubble, none of us is perfect. Don’t worry about following in my footsteps: you can’t fill the shoes. Tune out and amp up your Twitter account – for that’s where your fan base lies. Supporters may think you’re hot in pics but they are not athletic supporters – on the tennis court your game is colder than your personality. Or hit balls with Justin Bieber – you made a Belieber out of him in the “Desert Smash” didn’t you?

My diatribe above, aside, I sympathize with you and the concussion you suffered from slipping at the U.S Open near, or in, the locker room. I understand the area was not well lit – said to be dark, actually. I slipped up in being out of date, and being in the dark too, in not reading a missive WADA sent to athletes about this – now banned drug substance – taken by hundreds of thousands of people in Eastern Europe. I’ve missed 15 months because of my faux pas and you’ve struggled to climb back to respectable elite tennis since your misfortune. Since then, you’ve been struggling with an abdominal injury and I have been wrestling with the fact that I’m not getting any younger (I muffed, missed 13 of 16 break points in my first tourney back in the semi finals at the Porsche Grand Prix.) Both of us know we have to be physically and mentally fit to have a chance at any success at this level. Perhaps we are both human, perhaps we have made mistakes - unforced errors - and perhaps both of us should support one another - instead of the likes of you issuing blanket statements detailing on a subject you clearly know less than the square root of zero about.  You didn’t want to slip up and I didn’t want to screw up.

Hope you win, in your dreams, a Grand Slam one day.
​
Sincerely,
Maria.

​Just how will Aaron Hernandez’s 4-year-old child daughter ever come to grips with her murderous, suicidal daddy?

Her father came from a good family and wasted his life. He, despite nurturing from coaches, turned into a violent criminal. He has no excuses, he totally screwed up, and has now wrecked more than a few lives, and families.

He turned into a pathetic man and had turned to friends of dubious character. He smoked a lot of pot, and took Angel Dust (PCP). Both are said to have made him wary and a bit crazy. This could help explain why he killed Odin Lloyd. Plus Newsweek reports that Odin knew that Aaron was bisexual, and the football star was loathe for that fact to come out.

Amazingly, if the Newsweek analysis turns out to be true, it means that despite being educated at the University of Florida, Hernandez decided he’d rather risk going to jail if found guilty of killing Lloyd, than risk public awareness of the fact that he liked men sexually. With a mind so screwed up to weigh pros and cons that way, it only goes to show that Hernandez was an idiot. Aaron is rumored to have left a $50,000 watch to his alleged prison boy-toy love, 22-year old fellow convict, Kyle Kennedy, a guy in jail for a knife-point robbery that netted him $189 big ones. Another idiot.

(Even more idiotic is how some ex-Gator teammates are reacting to his suicide. They’re sad and sympathetic.)

Bristol, Connecticut was Aaron’s hometown. Besides being put on the map of public opinion due to its now infamous son, Bristol is the home of ESPN. Anyway, there Hernandez was known as “our Golden Boy.” A man playing with children – that refers to sports – not as an insinuation of improper sexual relationships...

And now, thanks to his hanging, his brain will be researched for concussion symptoms. Let’s hope, even if it turns out that Hernandez had a concussion, or concussions, with all the traumatic symptoms of dizziness, confusion, nausea, and headaches that arise from same - that such findings do not detract from the huge fact that Aaron was a total prick.

Aaron came from a strong family. He didn’t have to become a goof. Dennis Hernandez was a caring dad who coached his son in little league. Aaron abided by father’s structure and reportedly his dad’s ways: “...kept him anchored.” Unfortunately, Dennis died after hernia surgery – and unfortunately Aaron lost his way, as Tiger Woods did, when his father passed...

Aaron tattooed his father’s “advice” onto his arms – yet thereafter rebelled against authority. Somehow, however, mother, Terri, and brother, D.J., unlike Aaron, survived Dennis’s death without going off the deep end. D.J. will be head football coach at Ledyard High School, in Connecticut and admits that his and Aaron’s reaction to their father’s death was “...completely different.”

While D.J. is obviously a role model who deserves sympathy for being highlighted because of Aaron’s  acts, we should not excuse him and give him a mulligan when he resorts to euphemisms in discussing his younger brother:

“...He’s in a situation because he decided to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, with the wrong people.”

In a situation? What kind of depiction of Aaron’s life is that? Until his suicide Aaron was behind bars for LIFE. That’s not a situation it’s a life sentence. Tell it like it is...

Foolish behavior, such as flunking marijuana drug tests while at university, and thuggish behavior, such as (apparently) sucker punching the Manager of the Swamp restaurant, breaking his left eardrum – over a bill – which teammate Tim Tebow tried to settle – shows just how myopic and ethically vacant are those Florida Gators who reacted with compassion to his suicide.
 
So why did pro football’s, New England, draft this guy, given his reputation? Because the guy could flat out play, number one, and because Bill Belichick, the Patriots coach, trusted and believed in the words and ways of Florida Gators coach, Urban Meyer, number two. So background checks faded to the background.  Hernandez probably helped his case too, wooing the Patriots in a letter stating he was willing to undergo bi-weekly drug tests in his rookie season...

And, as skill would have it, Hernandez, with 45 catches in year one, 2010, set the new Patriots receptions mark for tight ends. Life was looking up.

In 2012 he signed a 5-yr, 40 million dollar extension after proving he could excel with his great running and catching attributes. He had everything to live for, heck his daughter was born in November 2012...yet so did Odin Lloyd have everything to live for – who Hernandez murdered in 2013.

Lest anyone think Aaron got a raw deal in his trial, recall that Alexander Bradley claims his right eye was shot out because of Aaron Hernandez, and recall too, that Aaron shot at a vehicle in Boston because of a tiff over a spilled drink - AKA “The Spilled Drink Case” - earlier in a bar.

Clearly Hernandez is the most wretched wanker in this piece. But honorable mention must go to a sports agent, Brian Murphy. He used to represent Hernandez. Take his tweet.  “Absolutely no chance he took his own life. Chico was not a saint, but my family and I loved him and he would never take his own life.”

Chico (that was his nickname) was not a saint? Isn’t that underplaying Aaron’s atrocious acts by about a million points? Why is an agent like Murphy so lacking in passing reasoned, thoughtful, sane judgment? In the sports agent world, if one has a paying client - no matter if that client is a naff to put it mildly, or a devil to put it accurately - does this mean decency and astuteness when opining on depraved criminals, by said agent(s) go by the wayside? Money corrupts, huh?

As for the 4-year-old daughter? She’ll probably take cues from family elders. Some don’t believe the suicide explanation.  And perhaps, delusional until the end, they can take some solace in Massachusetts legal finery: With his suicide, some legal experts propound that, under Mass. Law – Aaron dies an “innocent man” because his appeal(s) had not been heard...

​Has the world turned finally? Has facial cosmetic surgery met its Waterloo? With Melanie Griffith’s undoing of her facial enhancements, perhaps people of all stripes and sexes will realize that facial “improvements” by medical hands – for beauty and beautiful purposes – is a detriment.

We, the uneducated, the gawping, gaping bystanders, have seen the pictures of starlets and have wondered: why did Meg Ryan, Mary Tyler Moore, Nicole Kidman decide to wreck their looks...in the quest for a fleeting chance that perhaps they’d look a week or two younger than their actual ages?

Courtney Cox.  Donatella Versace. Joan Van Ark – look completely different after their “work.” But if they, and we, are looking for changes and betterments to our beings, isn’t it more prudent to look inwards – at our personalities and thoughts – to alter these, than to mess around with skin deep, surface-only moderations and alterations such as puffed up lips, or nose reduction-lob-off jobs?
​
Perhaps these mishaps of Melanie Griffith’s visage voyage of artificial change will hit us witnesses where it’s real: we age, let us age naturally, without regret or fret and with a confidence and outlook that makes us proud to be how old we are. Sure, wrinkles and crow’s feet abound – but do these linear changes change the personas we’ve become and forged through ages of experience and learning for the worst?

Why risk wisdom gained for a face of liverwurst? Why do a Pete Burns plastic surgery horror show? Or a comedian Carrot top one? (Carrot Top says he just looks like he does because of makeup.) Why search for artificiality when reality will do genuinely fine? What’s the deal with trying to pull the wool over everyone’s eyes, thinking you’ve fooled them with a metaphorical bald pate comb over?

And let’s not even broach the subject of face tattoos, or piercings, ok?

All of us somewhat self aware know intrinsically that, basically, with time cynicism and jaundice coupled with biases arise – and that rejuvenation is called for. But such a renovation and improvement deals with matters of soul and of sense, not to do with removing beauty marks or pock marks.

Ok, let us, put pock marks and facial acne into another category. (And reconstructive surgery after an accident or birth defect into a separate category as well.) Many of us, as teenagers, were afflicted with facial acne and the desire to remove what society casts as an aspersion upon that person, seems warranted.

But to alter a perfectly, by reasonable standards – and while no one can define what reasonable means – we all know, deep down, what it entails – face to a more “perfect” face – is a disgrace. And, unfortunately the butcher works of years now with celebrities before and after pictures gives us onlookers and wonderers a first-hand, ok albeit from glossy magazines – view of the concept of COMEUPPANCE. Madonna, is almost recognizable here after having (possibly) cheek implants and skin tightening.

Astoundingly, there are derivatives of facial cosmetic surgery. Let’s say, for the moment, and moment is a key descriptive here, given the trend in polite circles to adhere and revere something called gender fluidity, that you’re a guy. But you are not happy with your face – because you look, say, a tad too manly.

No problem! March yourself down to the nearest locale that performs something called FACIAL FEMINIZATION.

I can’t nearly describe all that such entails, but a bloke, specialist Dr. Philip Young, can – and does:
“...brow bone reduction, tracheal shave, brow lift, orbital bone reduction, lip lift, rhinoplasty, vy lip advancement, cheek implants, hairline lowering, chin reduction, permanent lip implants, eyelift, eyelid crease formation.”

But beware, not so much of the transgender transformation cock-of-the-walk, but of the fact that, either Dr. Young or who ever put together his website, can’t write English adequately.

Get this – “Perhaps one of the most important things that make us unique and special for you in your transition from male to female is Dr. Young’s Understand on Facial Beauty.”

See the word “Understand?” not only is the use of it wrongly capitalized, it’s the wrong phraseology. It should be “understanding.”

Anyway,

Back to facial disfigurement(s). Don’t take my words here for alarmist, doomsday pronunciations of all that can go wrong with facial beauty surgical enhancements. Go to Google. Type: Facial Cosmetic Surgery gone wrong.

As of April 14th 2017, about 2,240,000 results will appear. This is not a trend, folks, it’s an avalanche of bad news of botched up jobs in the quest for quintessential deity-like  looks, turning out to, um, uh – Melanie Griffith.

But Griffith has seen the light (having heard unkind comments of her facial changes.) Could this actress start a trend where people, who have had awful results from facial cosmetic enhancements, try to undo the damages that have been done?

If so, this could be the greatest role she’ll ever play...

Of course, let’s not get carried away with this reversal of facial cosmetic surgery: word is, some women from Texas are paying mega thousands to look like Ivanka Trump...

​Big boss of the Calgary Flames, Ken King, should get out more. If he wants the city and province of Alberta to pony up funds for a new hockey arena, he should know that with both hurting economically, since oil and gas crashed, the priority of spending public dollars to help rich team owners like billionaire N Murray Edwards or Alvin G. Libin make more money in a new spiffy rink – is a lower desire than is the Flame’s wish to face Anaheim the in the first round of the Stanley Cup Playoffs this spring. (The Flames haven’t beaten the Ducks in Anaheim’s arena since January 19th, 2004 – some 26+ of their contested games ago...)

The current hockey venue, the Saddledome, has the iconic horizontal swayback roof, and is a postcard-tourist landmark, and yet did the dirty digging into the corners – being the first North American rink to feature international hockey dimension standards by design. It is also perfectly positioned within the Calgary Stampede grounds.  NHL President and general busybody, pissant Gary Bettman, perfectly and pedantically disdains the arena, calling it “old, antiquated, inefficient...” which is yet another reason for the Calgary populace, if they should need one, to stick to the Saddledome and tell Bettman to stick it where the sun don’t shine.
 
True, the Saddledome has been functioning since the beginning of time – 1983 – but it did undergo renos in 1994-1995. If the place needs an update, by all means update...but, of course, the big questions is: where would the Flames play if major renos are needed?
​
But this is where things get complicated – the City of Calgary owns the joint. The city is a public entity with a Mayor and 14 City Councillors. In other words, the buck stops with the politicians. And if they don’t want to fix up the Saddledome – they’ll certainly make the operator of it, the Calgary Sports and Entertainment Corporation, of which Ken King heads, have an easier argument to make - in moving the team elsewhere. Of course the Plan A the Flames ownership consortium proposed, besides being hundreds of millions lower in costs than it would be actually, was to build its new team arena in the West Village of Calgary.

The West Village borders the banks of the Bow River – the same river that flooded out the East Village and lots of downtown Calgary in 2013. So Plan A is drowning in faulty dollar estimations and could be drowning in nearby natural eruptions.
 
Then the City of Calgary would continue to own the Saddledome featuring two lesser luminaries: the Calgary Hitmen, a Junior hockey team, and the Calgary Roughnecks, a Pro lacrosse league group – and while both may be stellar to their base – a junior hockey and a pro lacrosse enterprise – are, collectively, an oyster and singularly, no pearl, (though the Roughnecks have made the post-season yearly since 2002!)   

First, however, one must make the argument that the Saddledome needs a new coat of paint, etc. Has this been conclusively determined? Bettman doesn’t offer specifics as to why he thinks the building stinks, but does proffer platitudes. He says a new arena is “vitally important.”  But to who? Calgary Mayor Naheed Nenshi claims 99% of Calgarians don’t want him to spend a dime of their monies on a new building. So, is it important to Bettman’s ego, or to the sensibilities of the other NHL franchises ownership principals?
​
As for Mr. King – let’s call his bluff: where would he move the team to? Hamilton – Toronto would never go for it. Regina or Saskatoon – too few people and too many miles to attend games.  Possibly Quebec City? Or would the Montreal Canadiens prevent such a move like they helped defer the QC city bid for a franchise in that hockey hot bed of Las Vegas, instead? Or would he try his luck in another part of the American Sun Belt? There aren’t a lot of great options.

He could be talking through his hat. Fortunately for Ken, he has the option, and does willingly exercise it here, of talking disingenuously when he masks the money pitch with this faux-self deprecating statement.

"If people smarter than us in more powerful positions than ours don't feel that we're a critical piece of the social, economic and cultural part of our city, then who are we to argue with that?"

One must suppose Ken thinks the Calgary Flames are a critical piece of the town. They’re certainly important, and loved, but to say any team, of any sport, is critical to any city, is nonsense. If Ken thinks the Flames are so hot, let him find private investors willing to spend dough on a new rink.

Yet, nowadays, a new arena is used for entertainment as well as sport. And music insiders say that Edmonton, with its new Rogers Place, has garnered top flight acts while Calgary has been shut out. So a new complex would help Cowtown compete in that milieu. But does a new structure boost a city’s economy?

Quick answer? Depends on the sport. NFL stadiums host so few games annually – let’s be generous and say 11 in total including pre-season and playoff(s) that the returns from the contests alone do not merit public investment. So says Stanford Economics professor, Richard Noll.

But an NHL team will have 41 regular season games, not including pre-season or playoffs, and according to Wayne Karl, a pundit an matters of Real Estate, residential property values nearby a new rink rise – bringing in more tax dollars to affected governments – so long as tax increases to bring about a birth of a new stadium are not part of the deal. He cites the aforementioned Rogers Place...

Ultimately, however, Calgarians might be willing to pay some dollars to keep the team. After all, if Winnipeg has an NHL outfit, Calgary HAS TO HAVE one.